First I would like to point out that anything outside of the one true God is dysfunctional but for this article I want to talk about the 7 most common things that most people use as a God. See anything can become your God if you focus too much on it and less on God himself. You may be asking what does this have to do with marriage but as you read each one, you will realize that it has everything to do it marriage.
1) Money – This of course is the most common one that people think of. Money is a great tool for the Kingdom but when you have gotten to the point where your whole life revolves around creating an income then something is wrong. Granted I understand having no money is bad to a lot of people too but I would rather have almost nothing than lose my soul to money. Again, don’t hear me wrong on this, I am not saying money is bad because it isn’t good or bad. What I am saying is when money has you then it is bad. Has money become your God?
2) Time – This is an issue that when I talk about it many people get very uncomfortable. God not only expects us to be good stewards of our money but he also expects us to be good stewards in how we use our time. If all you do is work because of money then your time is gone. I see many people including people in ministry who work 60 or more hours a week then turn around and bring another 15-20 hours a week of work home with them.
This is no way to live especially if you have a family. You can always make more money once spent but you can never get more time back. Your time has become an enemy to you and you need to make some changes if you are finding that you just have no time for anything.
What if your church needed someone for 1 week to do something special and you felt God was telling you to go? Could you work that out? If you don’t know then now is the time to start making some changes because God just may ask you to step out on Faith for something.
3) Career – Again, this kind of goes with money and time but it is in itself a God because many people put their careers above everything in their lives including their families. I have seen many marriages fall apart because of this issue. How many times do you hear that people work late hours because of their career? Do they have a choice? They say they don’t but in reality they do because we all have choices and yes their choice may lose their job but what is more important, your family or your career? How about God or your career? Has your career become your God?
4) Possessions – This is the part where people may be calling you materialistic? I do not use this word lightly because my definition is a little different than most peoples’ on this. If you have a lot of nice things many people will call you that but my definition of materialism is using material possessions to fulfill a spiritual need.
Is that not true? When you are buying things to try and fill that void in you, to me that is when you have crossed the line into materialism. It is when your things own you, you don’t own them anymore. So have the material things become your God?
5) Technology – This one goes along with things but I feel that this is in a category of its own because of the age that we live in. Technology is a great thing to have. It is supposed to enhance our lives and make it easier but in many cases it has now become a God for many people.
Have you caught yourself not wanting but NEEDING that latest gadget when it comes out before everyone else? Willing to wait in line for 24 hours even though you can get the same thing a week or so later? Do you catch yourself just needing to update your status update on Facebook or Twitter every place you go? You feel as though the world would fall apart if they didn’t know your every move?
Technology is a great tool for us to use to enhance our lives and to grow the Kingdom of God. But it becomes a tool for satan when you cross that line into making it a God. So has technology become your God?
6) Your Spouse – I saved the last two for last because most people do this without even realizing it. When making people your God, they will always disappoint you. I know people who expect their spouses to be perfect and in a perfect world that would be great but we don’t live in a perfect world. Our spouses aren’t perfect and neither are we.
Do you bow to your spouse? Do anything they say no matter what? Don’t confuse what I am saying here. Don’t try and say that I am saying that we should not do things for each other because that is not what I am saying. Many times when a spouse has become a God to you, it is a one-way street. They don’t treat you the way you treat them. People who read this probably know who I am talking about where they have made their spouse their God. They live to serve their spouse before they even think about God.
Many men use the bible to say their wife should serve them no matter what but they misquote the verses that talk about that.Here is the actual verse that gets misquoted:
Ephesians 5:21-25 (Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her)
See if they keep reading then they would see that it also says that the man should love their wife as Christ loves the church. Think about that? Now that is TRUE love. So before you think that your wife is not living up to the bible then you need to ask yourself are you loving her like Christ loves the church?
7) Kids – WOW, this one is hard especially for the moms. When kids become the God then the whole house is out of whack. The kids know when a mom or dad has made them God and they will use that power against both of you. Kids can’t be your God. If they are it is time to change that.
Of course there are many other things that people have created into a God but I believe these 7 things represent most of them. Most things fall into one of these categories. Like I could talk about your family being a God and that would fall into the last two in a way so as you see you can make anything your God.
God wants to be the God of your life and nothing else. God is a God of love but he also hates it when he is not first in our lives. Making anything else into a God leads to a life of dysfunction. Are you ready to change and leave all your God’s behind you and focus on the one true God from this point?
Ask God to come into or back into your life. Ask him to give you the wisdom to know what in your life you are treating as a God and have placed above him. Ask God to give you the courage to let go of all these Gods.
Living an Inspired Marriage!
Chris Benton
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