Thinking back over the last 14 years. WOW today is our 14th year anniversary. because of my addictions, I did not know if we would make it this long. Thank God he healed me from those addictions almost 9 years ago because I know in my heart if that did not happen then we would not be married today and Lil Chris for sure would not be here. The first 5 years of our marriage, most women would have left but not Sandy. She loved me through my addictions and prayed every night for God to change my heart. This was for YEARS! I am so thankful that she is the most patient person that I know because she is probably the only women that could have helped me change and I know that is why God brought her into my life to be my amazing wife.It is amazing the journey that Sandy and I have been on. We have had way more ups than downs especially the last 9 years after the addictions. We still have some connection through the addictions but I could tell it was fading back then.
Now we are stronger than ever and I believe going through those rough years has made Sandy and I strong today! It is our past that helps us realize that as a couple, we can get through anything as long as we stick together! It is when we are on the same page which 99% of the time we are that magic within our marriage happens.
I have to pinch myself from time to time to make sure I am living in reality because I watch how most marriages are and we are not most marriages.
This is a part of the reason we want to do our marriage ministry and to share our story across the stages of the world because married couples need to see that with God, there is still hope for their marriages. They don’t have to give up so soon.
So many couples have a rough patch and are ready to throw in the towel because they feel there is no hope but we are here to tell you there is always hope with God for your marriage. He may be working on your spouse’s heart right now and you may not know it. That was what happened with us. Sandy had no idea if I would ever change so she trusted God for that part and loved me in spite of those rough times the first 5 years of our marriage.
If physical abuse or cheating is happening then that is different because you have to protect yourself from violence. You can’t ride that out but if those two things are not happening then there is hope. And even if violence is happening, there is hope but you still have to leave to stay safe and allow your spouse to get help BEFORE you attempt to come back and work things out.
No matter what God can change the whole direction of your marriage. If we went through the hell we did and came out of it with God’s light then you can to. Just believe and keep asking God what you need to do because he will guide you if you keep your heart open to him!
Chris & Sandy Benton
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I am co-founder of Inspired Marriage. I went through 19 years of addictions until God healed me Dec 26th, 2007. The first 5 years of our marriage was hell because of my addictions. With Sandy's patience, I was able to allow God to work in me and we have been growing spiritually together ever since! Oct 5th, 2023 was 21 years of marriage and it's been an inspired one!
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